twitter twaddle: #QuestionsForGirls

click this stupid bird and follow me on Twitter. i’d say you won’t regret it, but that’s probably a lie.

so normally i respond to the ridiculous things people say on twitter when i do this, and i will, but today, the ladies get to answer them all, too. i mean, it is called #questionsforgirls. as in plural. and good as i am, i am only one. i’ll lead off with my answers in the comments. ladies, go for it.

1.  #QuestionForGirls Why do some of you shave off your eyebrows just to draw them back on?

2.  #QuestionForGirls why do some of yall have ponytails that look like baby paint brushes ?

3.  #QuestionForGirls Why can’t you put mascara on with your mouth closed?

4.  #QuestionForGirls Why do you buy things you don’t need, with money you don’t have, to impress people you don’t like?

5.  #QuestionForGirls why do you post your nails on Instagram every time you get them done? Nobody cares about that.

6.  #QuestionForGirls why do you take so long to get ready?

7.  #QuestionForGirls does it hurt when you get kicked there?

8.  #QuestionForGirls why you think its okay to go to the store with pajamas?

9.  #QuestionForGirls what if a guy takes you to dinner and makes you pay for the bill?

10.  #QuestionForGirls what do you have in that oversized handbag that you desperately need with you at all times?

11.  #QuestionForGirls why cant you just tell a dude whats wrong?

ladies, have at it. answer away.

gentledudes, what other questions do you have for girls?

p.s. today will be the 3rd episode of the Wednesday Nooner. we will be giving a book review on 50 Shades of Grey. and by review, i mean we hated it and spend a lot of time bitching about the crappy writing. oh, and since Tamara didn’t read it, Alise and i make her do a cold read that is truly horrifying.

see you at noon eastern.

download The Wednesday Nooner directly from iTunes.

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28 comments on “twitter twaddle: #QuestionsForGirls

  1. 1. to looked chronically surprised? father was a rodeo clown? i have no idea.
    2. genetics. the hair is just thin. not mine though. i have enough for any 3 people. just ask my drain.
    3. physically impossible. any girl who puts her hand up to eye right now and pretends to put on her mascara, is going to immediately look like a prized koi.
    4. insecurity. dumb, but true. stupid.
    5. i don’t get my nails done, so i don’t have a clue. anybody want to see a pic of my raggedy nails?
    6. takes me twenty minutes. 2 of those with my mouth open while i put on mascara.
    7. doesn’t it hurt when you get kicked anywhere?
    8. because getting ready takes so effing long for most. can’t have it both ways, dude.
    9. i would tell everyone we both know. seriously. i totally would. schmuck gotta pay somehow.
    10. no idea. that’s as much a mystery to me as it is to you. i’m notorious for my tiny purses. some wallets are bigger than the purses i carry.
    11. good question. i sure hope “beats me” is the answer you’re looking for.

  2. Jenn says:

    1. I don’t and those who do I think are ridiculous.
    2. Because it is a long time to wait for hair to grow out long enough to put it back, give us a break.
    3. You can – as to why you need to have a your mouth open I don’t know.
    4. Those girls are not graduate student -so I don’t know about that either.
    5. Again not a grad student thing to do, so I don’t know.
    6. 30 minutes is long? I guess.
    7. Don’t know I’ve never done anything that warrants I test that out.
    8. I don’t, unless you’re deathly ill and making your own run to the pharmacy
    9. It has happened and it normally doesn’t bother me, just don’t call it a date and don’t expect a kiss
    10. Planner, current school reading, small Bible, chap-stick, small brush, phone, bus pass, umbrella, ipod and the list goes on. It’s my mobile life support.
    11. I can and do you normally don’t handle that process well, thus the not saying the truth.

    @Sharideth, I don’t understand most of these, does that mean I need to hand in my girl card?

  3. Sarah says:

    1. I don’t.

    2. Because the look of a ponytail will depend on hair length. Regardless of hair length, sometimes people just want their hair UP and NOT TOUCHING THEM. I doubt these girls do this for style.

    3. I can. And do.

    4. I don’t.

    5. I don’t.

    6. My hair takes a long time to dry and style. That’s it.

    7. I don’t know. But it likely hurts to be kicked, period.

    8. I don’t.

    9. I pay for my portion and leave.

    10. Wallet, sunglasses, phone, hairbrush, makeup, book, sometimes camera.

    11. I can.

  4. Heidi K says:

    1. They’re practicing for when they’re old ladies?
    2. Because sometimes the hair just has to get out of the way, and if all you got’s a baby paintbrush, all you got’s a baby paintbrush.
    3. I .. I have no idea.
    4. Because that’s the way of America!
    5. I don’t have instragram. 😦
    6. I don’t? And if I do, it’s probably all mental preparation.
    7. yes
    8. Because you don’t want us to take so long getting ready.
    9. dine and dash
    10. Dude, I have the same question. If you ever get a good answer, hook a girl up.
    11. I got nothin’.

  5. I think a big man question for women would be:

    Why can’t you settle on a hairstyle? I’ve had my hair cut the same basic way for over 20 years. I know some women who can’t seem to stick with a hairstyle for over 20 days. It looked fine the way it was, why are you changing it?

    On that note, why do you have it cut where it hangs in your eyes and then spend all day pushing it out of your eyes? There are lots of cute hairstyles that do not give you this constant irritation. Scissors were invented to fix that.

    • Lynne says:

      Women are more likely to have longer hairstyles than men. If said hair is longer, there are more possible options. Sometimes we are indecisive, sometimes we are very decisive about a desire for change, sometimes it’s about never being the same, sometimes it’s a control issue. Hair is an easy thing to change, because it always grows back. Some women consider it to be a very strong piece of their identity and some don’t. In that sense, one can continually change an identity with a haircut, reflecting the constant growth and change of an individual personality. Women are more likely to feel the tug towards finding their value and worth in their appearance, that appearance can easily be manipulated and controlled with a hairstyle. Sticking to the same hairstyle for 20 years would mean not being current with fashion trends. Changing your hair after a break up is really really satisfying, for most of these reasons.

      Also, if you think about it, while you might have had the same type of hairstyle for a long period of time, if it’s a short style you have to cut it quite frequently to keep it that way. Some women may simply choose a different cut each time they go to the salon.

  6. Annie says:

    1. SHAVE off? Trannies.
    2. Short hair = short ponytail
    3. I think all girls put mascara on how they saw their mom put it on- my mom had her lips pursed. Me- pursed
    4. I buy things I don’t need with money I should spend elsewhere, but it’s always for me, not to impress others. Esp not for others I don’t like
    5. I, too, couldn’t care less about a mani pics
    6. I wake up at 5:20am, leave the house at 5:35am. I can hang with the boys.
    7. Yes. Yes it does.
    8. Ghetto
    9. I’m with Shar, I would tell every one. Cheap ass.
    10. I’m a medium purse girl. Usually phone, money and chapstick is all I need.
    11. We were all young once and told our immature high school/ college boyfriend “what’s wrong” and he soo didn’t handle it well and we swore off telling ” what’s wrong” for ev er

  7. 1: I don’t, and I have no idea why the ones who do, do.
    2: Because when you’re trying to grow your hair it goes through this *really* annoying stage where it gets in your face all the time, but is too short to tie back properly. So we end up with the baby paintbrush look.
    3: It’s a physical impossibility. Same as sneezing with your eyes open.
    4: I don’t. If they don’t like me and I don’t like them, then there ain’t no point trying to impress.
    5: My nails are kept so short folks that don’t know me think I chew them off. A nail model I definitely ain’t.
    6: With short hair and minimal make up – I don’t.
    7: Hell yes! When you get kicked there, when you fall off your bike and it hits there, when you walk into the corner of a table that is just the right height etc. Drops me every time.
    8: Never done it. Don’t understand women who do.
    9: Then I’d tell all my friends about him, write him up on FB, tweet about him and generally try to save the local sisterhood from making the same mistake I did.
    10: I don’t do purses, I do pockets, or possibly a teeny tiny money purse if my clothes aren’t the pocket type.
    11: Can’t help you, except to say there’s some *strange* ladies out there!

  8. Jen says:

    1. I ask myself this very question.

    2. I’m not exactly sure what you mean here. I have finer hair, but it’s long so I don’t think that’s it. Maybe you mean girls with short hair putting their hair in a ponytail? I’d say because it’s annoying them and they want it out of their face.

    3. I can, and I do, every day.

    4. I don’t know. Why do guys always have to keep reading material in the bathroom? I seem to have no problem doing my business sans People Magazine. There are lots of mysteries about the opposite sex out there, just accept it and move on.

    5. I don’t. I don’t even get my nails done. Who are these women and why are you following them on Instagram if you don’t like it?

    6. You know how guys always say they love a girl who looks great in jeans & a t-shirt, but also who can dress it up for a night on the town (online daters know)…well that takes time. I can say I use heated things (blow dryer, flat iron…) and get particularly hot so some of the getting ready time is devoted to not sweating off my make-up before I leave the house.

    7. Does it have nerve endings? (stupid question)

    8. I don’t.

    9. 1. That’s the last time we are hanging out. 2. Everyone within a 25 mile radius that I can tell will know about it. (That question reads like I would be “forced” to pay, and therefore my answer. Plus, if I pay, he’s not taking me to dinner so that makes it moot.)

    10. wallet, keys, phone, altoids, sunglasses, advil for stupid questions…oh and plenty of room for your crap. “Can you put my stuff in your bag?” *hands over wallet, keys & sunglasses* –Every guy I’ve ever dated

    11. Can’t help you with that one either. I will. And do.

    • Jen says:

      I would like to add to #4. I don’t buy things to impress other people. If I buy something it’s because I like it.

    • Re: reading material in the bathroom. It’s because they need an activity to occupy them while they’re stuck mostly motionless for a while, in the case of reading material LEFT in the bathroom. I’ve never personally done that one, but I’ve been known to take something with me now and then, because sitting on the toilet is a necessary waste of time you could be DOING something. Reading at least feels like the time is not entirely wasted.

      • Mr says:

        motionless? thats simply not true: theres hope, pain, happyness, frustration, content-ment (is that a word), anger, relief to name a few. its a sanctum, not a waste of time
        as for reading, comics are funny.

  9. Abby says:

    1. I don’t. Someone got overzealous with the tweezers. In all fairness, some have blonde (read: invisible) or patchy eyebrows and choose to draw them on or at least fill in the bald spots.

    2. I do this at home. Some of us just want our short or fine hair out of the way for a while.

    3. I do open my mouth and raise my eyebrows. It is supposed to make it easier to get the mascara on my eyelashes and not my skin… or something.

    4. I don’t. I only buy things I need or like and can afford.

    5. I’ve only done it once and it was to show my girlfriends. If you don’t like it, follow the Instagram feed of someone who posts more interesting photos.

    6. My morning routine is carefully designed to give me enough time to fully wake up and have breakfast and coffee before driving or operating heavy machinery. It’s better for everyone this way.

    7. Getting kicked anywhere hurts.

    8. I don’t.

    9. It has never happened to me. Anyone who invites me out and expects me to pay for them is just rude (whether it’s supposed to be a date or not). That said, before I started dating my current boyfriend, I always assumed invitations implied everyone paying for themselves unless specifically told otherwise.

    10. All my stuff* fits snugly in a small purse, but it’s easier to dig around inside a medium-sized one. *Tic-tacs, wallet, phone, ID badge, pen, multi-purpose balm, hand-sanitizing spray, tissues, saline drops. Normally used by others: Gum, bandaids, pain reliever, antihistamine. The last item has come in handy three different times in the past 18 months when people had allergic reactions to something they ate.

    11. If something is wrong, I’ll tell you because you can’t be expected to read my mind. On rare occasions when I don’t tell you what’s wrong, I say a) I don’t know what’s bothering me, or b) I know what’s wrong but it is irrational or has nothing to do with you so I don’t want to bother you with it.

  10. One thing I would explain for women with regard to #7, after the “stupid question” comment, is that when men ask this they’re really not asking if it hurts (of course they know it does). What they’re asking is whether it’s as intense and disabling a pain for a woman as it is for a man to get kicked in that particular place. It’s not really whether it hurts at all, it’s whether it’s as painful for you as it is for us.

    There is, we assume, a big difference in pain level between a man getting kicked in the chest and a woman getting kicked in the chest (assuming only impact pain and not a broken bone or something). So we may legitimately wonder if there is a similar level of difference for the lower area or if the number of internal nerve endings equate out to a closer equivalent of our own pain level.

    Hopefully that is a carefully worded but useful explanation of the question. :>

    • Jeremy says:

      Looking at this question from a completely anatomical position, I could see it still hurting a lady in a fairly debilitating way because of the concentration of nerve endings in a certain small area. So if a kick were place “perfectly” I don’t see why it wouldn’t hurt just as much. However, us guys have the disadvantage of our area being a bit easier to hit.

  11. Mike says:

    #babypaintbrushponytails are the BEST ponytails of all. Don’t listen to the haters, ladies.

  12. 1. Eww, women do that?

    2. Because the hair style is short and super annoying.

    3. I’ve tried to put on mascara with my mouth closed and the results were funny…if only to me. It just seems to work better with my mouth open and eyebrows raised.

    4. I don’t!

    5. No i-phone, no instagram. (insert puppy eyes and pout)

    6. I grew up competing with my brothers. I never thought it was fair that they could get ready faster than me. But, I guess long hair and make-up keep me from getting ready as quickly. Still, I’m pretty dang fast for a girl!

    7. No clue, and thankful for it!

    8. Never! I’m a southern girl. Lipstick is required before I leave the house! I mean, what would my momma say!?!?!

    9. I’d pay, because I’m not as bold as the other women who have answered. But, I’d never been seen with you in public again-and you’d know exactly why!

    10. The oversized handbag is cute. And holds all my stuff. What stuff? Oh! Let’s see: a wallet, lipstick, checkbook, keys, work badge, sunglasses, cell phone, pens, and a book.

    11. I do. It hurts me as much as it hurts you. I promise!

  13. Scotty says:

    1. From an eyebrow-endowed chica, I’m going to guess that these girls have estimated their artistic abilities as superior to their hair-growing ones. Just my guess.
    2. Bc baby paint brushes are super cute — what of it?
    3. Been wondering this myself. Life’s mysteries. . .
    4. Bc impressing the people that we DO like is just too easy
    5. We do this so that we can accomplish #4. The people we don’t like are really impressed by the manicure we didn’t need that we paid for with money we didn’t have.
    6. It’s a complex formula, but I’ll simplify it for ya — we take so long so we can look pretty. Not that you will necessarily notice the difference, but the not-very-nice girls from #4 will notice that 15-minutes of eyebrow drawing.
    7. Yep. Straight shots to the baby maker are never pleasant.
    8. Because our mothers obviously taught us nothing
    9. And what if 50 Shades of Grey becomes a timeless classic? About the same probability.
    10. I normally have one or two books, a set of notecards of things I’m supposed to be studing instead of typing out answers to blog questions, and stacks and stacks of money to spend when #9 leaves me with a bill.
    11. I think it’s because once we say whatever we’re mad about out loud, 90% of the time we realize we’re being that obnoxious girlfriend we always said we wouldn’t be. Whoopsssss.

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