so it’s the week before Valentine’s Day…

already got a text this morning telling me not to say the V word.

my friends should really know better than to tell me what not to do.

really they should.

last year i wrote a post about the different ways people react to Valentine’s day.  i’m going to update it this year.

recycling old material?  really, sharideth?

yes.  shutup.   there will be some new stuff, too, Picky Pete.

6 different ways people react to Valentine’s Day:

1.  my elaborate, desperate plan isn’t ready yet! – “gah! it’s February and i haven’t hired the string trio yet!  the hand-pulped paper for the card hasn’t been pressed and the M&Ms with her face on them haven’t arrived!  whatever shall i do?”  calm the frack down, that’s what.

2.  again?  really? – some just wish the calendar skipped the 14th like some buildings skip the 13th floor.  it’s the most dreaded of all holidays and to be avoided at all costs.  we call these people bitter.

3. let’s get ironic! – oh the ever expanding popularity of the Anti-Valentine’s Day party.  broken heart cookies, skewered Lil’ Smokies, J. Geils Band, lots of booze to forget you’re alone, falling into the hot tub fully clothed with your father’s watch…yay!  was that too specific?

4.  meh – some people honestly don’t care Valentine’s Day even exists.  it’s just another day to them.  and by just another day, i mean they’ll end up sitting alone in the dark, pounding Tums flavored candy hearts that say, “You’re the One!”

5.  make reservations! – Craig and i fall in this category.  “let’s go celebrate the fact that we still like each other by spending way too much money on dinner.  okay?  awesome!”  one year he even threw in a wilted rose and an african american Hallmark card from Kroger.  so sexy.  but if you’ve waited until today to jump on the reservation train, you better plan to spend the day on the phone.  hope you have unlimited minutes.

6.  group therapy – these are the singles who are going to revel in their singleness.  they are going to get together and hang and laugh and make fun of each other’s romantic crash and burns.  good times.

which group are you?

any other options?


27 comments on “so it’s the week before Valentine’s Day…

  1. Jenn says:

    6? I’m hosting a “Mid-February” party this Saturday that will actually have no sign of Valentine’s Day, just all you can eat dessert fondue, some Cosmopolitans and some good times with the Wii and maybe a re-showing of Whip It last year’s movie choice.

  2. Kp says:

    I got ice axes for Valentine’s day once. Two beautiful, sharp instruments used for climbing frozen waterfalls. I don’t know if anyone can top that (for me). We spent the weekend huddled up together in 20 degree weather, drinking hot chocolate and climbing ice. Loved every minute.

    This year is my first single Valentine’s in 6 years, but something tells me I might get a hilarious text message, or something to make me blush, from a friend.

  3. Rachel says:

    I fall into Group 6 this year. I have a dear friend who organizes annual dinners for all her single girlfriends and the married ones who don’t think enough of V-Day to spend it exclusively with their husbands. It’s a much better option than crying into a bottle of champagne or something.

  4. Tyler Smith says:

    beers, brats and brothers.

    Valentine’s Day is an excuse to hang out on a Tuesday.

  5. A) Work. Because home business means not getting paid vacation days. :>
    B) Video Games. Because the game demo for the latest entry in one of my favorite games launches on V-Day. V stands for Videogames right?

    What? Yes, I know I’m a nerd. I’m cool like that.

  6. Caitlin says:

    Probably #6. Maybe we’ll start singing “Sexy and I know it.”

    Actually, I have no idea. It hasn’t been on my radar this year. Maybe the yearly showing of (500) Days of Summer is in order.

  7. randomlychad says:

    Last year, I was smart about the reservations, and made them for the night before V-Day. This year, I’m in group 5–and plan to be on the phone accordingly. Also last year, we went to Fogo de Chao. It was a meat orgy. In fact, it put my wife off of meat for about three weeks. But it was awesome! If you’ve never people, you must try a Brazilialn steakhouse just once.

  8. You forgot the category for Hallmark executives:

  9. I’m not sure I fit into any category. I have a post coming out on Friday on the topic. I see it as a day to show that you care about your friends and family in a little extra special way, whether you are single or not. It’s not about being with someone like society tries to tell us. I don’t do anything crazy like #1, just a card or something to say your special. Yeah, I still hand out V-day cards that the kids would hand out in school. This years are Shrek.

  10. After 20 plus years of marriage, I still rely on the old tried and true approach, which is to tell my husband I don’t give a rat’s ass about this Hallmark holiday, then cry all day and pick a fight when he doesn’t bring me flowers.

  11. G Fresh says:

    I plan on making a batch of Kickasses (, setting up a booth down on Main Street and trading them for phone numbers. #Winning

    • G Fresh says:

      Just to clarify, phone numbers from women. Sorry, The Joseph Craven.

    • Rachel says:

      yum. it’s a good thing i had my mouth full of my kickass chicken taco soup, or i might have licked my computer screen. i may or may not have drooled on my keyboard. these look delish and will make their way into a company dinner menu soon. in the mean time i plan on making the recipe go viral. get your little black book ready.

  12. Brian says:

    I’d be in group 5, but I’m in a long-distance relationship. I bought her a new outfit and flowers for Valentine’s Day.

  13. Bethany says:

    I’m not in any of the groups. I’m single and I actually like Valentine’s day. Everything is decorated all cute, someone will give me sympathy chocolate, and the kid I tutor will give me a Valentine.

    Maybe it’s juvenile, but I just think of V-Day as a celebration of chocolate, cheesiness and liking other people.

  14. Ed Blonski says:

    I don’t rely on Valentine’s Day to try to convince my wife that I love her with cards, candy and/or flowers.

    I tell her I love her every. day. of. the. year. I get her “I love you” cards randomly throughout the year. I make her dinner on August 7, March 28, October 4, and other days not Valentine’s Day.

    Doing this takes all the pressure off Valentine’s Day for both of us. We then are free to get a card for February 14 (we buy them at the Dollar Store or Target) for each other.

    That’s what Valentine’s Day looks like after 20 happy years of marriage.

  15. janakaye says:

    Another neglected category; those who wait for the holiday after Valentine’s day: Half-Price Chocolate Day.

    I’m lucky lucky enough to have a friend who works for an airline. We’re planning a standby trip over those days. of course, if the flights don’t work out with all you last-minute valentine getaway couples, I’ll be in category 5. (really 3)

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