top 82 questions to ask a guy: part 1

so once again i had something completely different to write about today and totally threw it out.  it’s friday.  i’m not getting heavy on a friday.  my friend, Amanda Bast, sent me this list she found.  there’s 82 questions, but i’m only doing the first 41 20 today.  it got long and i got bored.  don’t worry.  i’ll get to them all.  eventually.

they are suppose to be “questions to ask a guy”.  what they should be called is “questions to ask a guy if you want to scare the crap out of him and make him think you’re nuts”.

guys, i’m answering these on your behalf.  here we go:

1. What did you think of me when you first saw me? – that you seemed sane.

2. How would you describe your version of a perfect home?one with a state of the art alarm system.

3. Have you been in love before? – why are you bolding that last part?  and before?  yes.  right now?  no.

4. Who was your prettiest girlfriend? – oh no.  no no no no no nononononono.

5. What qualities in me attract you most? – when you don’t talk.  that’s my favorite.

6. Is there anything you would like to change about me? – how much time did you say we have?

7. What’s your thought on marriage, do you believe in it and do you ever want to be married? – i believe it exists.  like narwhals.  not sure i’ll ever see it in person.  like narwhals.

8. Are you open to a live-in relationship? – no.

9. Does your boss like you or does he take you for granted? – my boss is a tool.  pretty sure his middle name is Craftsman.

10. If you could go on a dream holiday, where would it be? – i’m on one right now.  in my head.

11. What is the wildest thing you have ever done? – more bolding?  well, i think i’m about to run screaming from this coffee shop, so that would be right up there.

12. Who is the one person you hate in your family? – my mom.  does that scare you?  it should really scare you.  you’re still here?  fine.  next question.

13. What is the one most embarrassing thing you have ever done? – asked you out.

14. Describe your first date? What did you do, where did you go? Did you love her?excuse me for a second.  i’ve just shat myself.  love her?  on a first date?

15. If you were lucky enough to win the lottery, what would you do? – move to the opposite side of the world.  maybe girls are less frightening there.

16. If you were caught in a fire and had to choose between saving your dog and new TV, what would you choose? – if i say TV, will you leave in a huff?

17. Who do you talk to more when in a problem, your mother or father? – my parents are dead.

18. If you came across a genie who offered to make three of your wishes come true, what would those wishes be? – for this conversation to end.  for this conversation to end.  and for this conversation to end.  wait, scratch that last one.   Mila Kunis.  i’d wish for Mila Kunis.  she can ask me anything she wants.

19. Do you have any addictions? – not yet, but i’m probably going to start drinking heavily immediately.

20. What are your fetishes? – i’m developing a real thing for restraining orders.

ever been asked a seriously awkward question way too early in the game?

who’s watching the playoffs this weekend?  predictions?

if you couldn’t give a rodents rear end about football, what are you up to this weekend?

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26 comments on “top 82 questions to ask a guy: part 1

  1. Whoever put these questions out there should go into a mental institute stat and never give anybody advice… every again.

    I’ve been asked “so what kind of guys are your ‘type’?” All I could think of in my head was “NOT your kind”

  2. Mandie Marie says:

    As soon as I read #4, I thought “Well this needs to get sent to Sharideth.”

  3. Jenn says:

    The awkward questions seem to just happen all the time around me – normally about kids or parents. Normally the parents question is never their fault, but they walk into it and I don’t know quite yet how to get them out of it unscathed without outright lying, also I have found being vague to avoid lying seems to be signal to single men to press the issue rather than a big signal to avoid it.

    Um, I like football and I understand it but being in graduate school means I have almost no time to attach myself to a TV. I do watch whatever is on while I iron or cook my week’s meals. That being said I believe my Systematic Theology grade is dependent on my cheering for SF, given that the NYG took out GB, and GB is apparently part of my prof’s genetic identity, so whether I watch it or not, I guess SF needs to win.

  4. Steph says:

    I once had a date end with the question “So…are you my girlfriend now?” …and that , surprisingly, wasn’t even the most awkward part of the evening.

  5. Christina says:

    Wow. it’s no wonder people aren’t getting past the first date, taking advice like that! Love the commentary. 🙂

  6. Some of those questions, I’d be so tempted to out-weird the person asking them.

    e.g.

    6. Is there anything you would like to change about me? – Your name, appearance, and marital status.
    8. Are you open to a live-in relationship? – Sounds better than a die-out relationship.
    15. If you were lucky enough to win the lottery, what would you do? – TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!!!

    The NFL playoffs, my prediction is Pats and Giants to win. Giants are hot right now, and the Pats have Tom Brady. ‘Nuff said.

    (of course, I’m guessing you mean NFL, and not one of the several other sports also called football)

    • I was once asked my phone number by a girl I didn’t even talk to. I gave it to her. She texted me. And asked me out for a day to the zoo. I thought that was pretty soon. No one ever did ask me either my phone number or to go to the zoo within one text ever before or after.

      I bet, after the sudden loss in the cup, Ajax may overcome AZ this time. Fingers crossed.

      I’m watching a movie tonight (any suggestions?), going ice skating on Sunday and might spend my Saturday doing nothing at all.

      • Jeremy says:

        I’m just waiting to see how Real rebounds after the loss in the Classico.

        • Rachel says:

          mmmm, real football. Much better. What will I be doing this weekend, Sherideth? Glad I’m going to borrow this and pretend like you asked (oh wait, you did). Well, the weather is glorious in Dallas right now. I think I am going to have to spend a significant time in a nature preserve soaking up some sun and fresh air and pretending I’m not in Dallas. And studying. Good, studious discipline doesn’t sound nearly so exciting.

  7. These questions are TERRIFYING. Women who believe these questions are worthwhile and who are determined to ask them should have to wear a special hat or something.

    My prediction for the football playoffs this weekend:

    1)I will get mad about a terrible roughing the passer penalty;
    2)I will get mad about a bad call that could not be overturned because the coach had no challenges left;
    3)I will get mad about the inconsistent verbiage and uneven enforcement of the NFL’s contact to the head rules.

    Now you have me wondering why I still watch the NFL…

  8. Bethany says:

    Who comes up with these? [Insert appalled face here]

    I don’t watch football, but my family has pretending that they do lately, so I’ll be ignoring the noise and reading “Catherine the Great” by Robert K. Massie.

  9. Rachel says:

    I can’t think of any circumstance in which any girl should ever ask any guy those questions. Or even entertain them herself. Unless she’s trying to get rid of an egocentrical creep an easy way.

    THAT right there is why guys are so committment phobic. They’re all afraid their girlfriends are going to come out of the closet with that psychotic, fatal-attraction behaviour as soon as they’re married. Can we stop people like that list maker from giving us a horrifying persona?

    Well done on the replies, Sharideth. It was good to laugh that hard on a Friday afternoon.

  10. I especially loved your answer on number 20. “i’m developing a real thing for restraining orders.” That’s awesomesauce right there.

    The only awkward question I currently recall being asked by a girl was being asked if I was a virgin, and it wasn’t a date question. I was pulled aside and asked by a classmate in a whisper before class started one morning. And it honestly wasn’t awkward for me, as I’m not ashamed of that status. Was not a question I expected, though!

    This weekend, besides working part of tomorrow, I will be blowing people up/being blown up in World of Tanks. Probably more being blown up than blowing others up if recent history is any indicator. Also shooting winter storms with arrows in LOTRO. And possibly sinking pirates and shooting Klingons and other daring do that doesn’t require leaving my computer chair. Did I mention I’m a nerd?

  11. Kristen says:

    “7. What’s your thought on marriage, do you believe in it and do you ever want to be married? – i believe it exists. like narwhals. not sure i’ll ever see it in person. like narwhals.”

    that is my EXACT answer. you captured it better than I have ever been able to…

  12. Regan says:

    I was asked several seriously awkward questions by a co-worker that I’m not even dating and who (I think) is married. He asked me what kind of teacher I was, and I said “authoritative.” He said, “Are you like that at home, too?” Wha???? My reply: “Well, I can’t really order my dog around too much.” 😛

  13. asoulwalker says:

    Seven and eighteen are beautiful and true. Thank you for the laugh.

  14. Laurie says:

    I met a guy through mutual friends. It wasn’t a date, just a, we all want you to meet this guy so we are all going to the bar. The guy was really attractive but I couldn’t get a word out of him. And then for some reason, I have no idea how it even fit into the conversation, I got tired of trying’ and exclaimed, “well dating sucks, did you know one in four people have herpes.” Still makes me laugh thinking about it. Poor guy looked like he was going to pass out. We both decided at that point to mingle with the rest of the group. He wanted to get away quick. The next day my friends had a talk with me about why I shouldn’t mention herpes statistics when I meet a guy. I can’t help it. I’m like a walking medical encyclopedia.

  15. […] this is from an actual list of questions created as a serious way to talk to a guy.  you can read part 1 aqui.  or here for those who never took high school […]

  16. […] awkward questions to ask a guy – you want to ask awkward questions?  all the answers are here, here, here and […]

  17. Nice amount of work gone in to this list and I hope more girls can see it, keep it more interesting ladies!

  18. bambi.loves.you says:

    I love the fetish one!!

  19. Woah this blog is excellent i really like reading your articles. Maintain the good paintings! You recognize, many individuals are usually hunting around for this data, you can help them greatly.

  20. mutolwa says:

    wow if i were her…ild shoot myself in the bum,not the head,i dont want to die,not yet.#trevor noah

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