a hand-drawn picture of a guy riding a giraffe as his break up notice isn’t the worst break up i’ve ever seen. it’s actually better than a couple i am personally responsible for.
1. i wrote a Dear John letter to guy who was in Iraq during the first Gulf War.
2. i stalked the hell out of a guy because i completely lost my mind and apparently had no other option than to make both our lives a living hell after a MUTUAL break up.
to both of them, i apologize. i suck. a lot.
i already wrote about how to survive a break up, so this time i’m going to fill you in how not to be a dick when you’re the one doing the breaking.
1. don’t drag it out – if you know you’re going to break up with her, she probably does, too. or at least suspects it and is driving herself crazy trying to figure out when and why. i don’t care if she’s the female equivalent of Hitler and deserves to get the small pox, be a man and end it.
2. leave her be – do. not. yank. her. chain. if you call her or want to “hang out” or ask her friends about her, she is going to interpret that as you wanting to be back with her. i’m telling you, even if you think you might want that, but aren’t 100% sure, leave her alone. you are only going to cause her more pain. let her get over you. girls have the uncanny ability to turn even the friendliest intention into hoping for a proposal.
3. keep your dating to yourself – no broadcasting some girl with her tongue down your throat on Facebook. no bringing a date to a place you know she’s going to be for at least a few weeks. do not throw your dating in her face. *disclaimer* if you broke up with her because she was a completely wretched person, allowing her to see that you’ve immediately moved on is fine, just don’t be a douche about it. high road, my friend. high. road.
4. don’t talk about her – notice i didn’t say “don’t talk bad about her”. just don’t talk about her period. keeping your mouth shut is always the better part of wisdom, no matter how things went down. it’s nobody’s business why things ended or how things ended. you have an opportunity to be a really decent human being and keep the ugliness to a minimum. take it.
5. check your motives – when you run into a situation and you have to decide what to do, evaluate what your motives are. if you are about to do something that would hurt her or cause others to think badly about her, check yourself. why would you do that except to stroke your own ego? if you are about to do something that would draw her attention back to you, but you know you don’t really want to date her again, check yourself. why would you do that except to stroke your own ego? see where i’m going?
you and i both know you are not required to be a dick when you break up with a girl, but it can sure look mighty appealing sometimes. instead, be a man. be honorable in your dealings with everyone; including those who have hurt you and especially those you have hurt.
have any of you ever broken up badly with anyone?
how hard is it to take the high road during a break up?
*i have no idea why the first chunk of this post is still gray. couldn’t get it to change. stupid.*