guys, i’m about to break something down for the ladies. you will have your chance to respond/cheer/tell me i’m dead wrong in the comments, but for right now, hang tight.
while i was
choking down reading an article at Men’s Health this morning, i came across this tid bit on their list of 50 Things Men Wish Women Knew:
If you’re truly interested in us, don’t play hard to get.
now, that doesn’t sound so bad on the surface. the problem is in the interpretation. you don’t have to read more than 5 or 6 comments on that post to see that communication breaks down pretty fast.
i’m glad i pretended like you asked.
ladies, men don’t want you to play to hard to get. real men don’t want you to “play” anything. that’s not real. that’s putting on a front and playing a game. yuck and ick and gross. don’t be that girl. that girl is freaking annoying and only attractive to guys not worth dating.
what men want is for you to not be easy to get.
calm down. there is a difference. and if i don’t miss my guess, the guys already know exactly where i’m going with this.
not being easy to get means you know your own self worth and you are going to make him work a bit to make sure he knows it too. that’s not a game, that’s wisdom. a quality girl will not be in a rush to add a man to her life. she will take time to get to know him and let him get to know her before deciding if he’s got a shot. knowing he’s got to work for it because you are confident enough to turn him down is like freaking catnip for dudes.
and before you ask, no, there is no prescribed time frame for this. sometimes you can know within the first conversation or two if the guy is worth your time. but the important thing is not to make him feel like you’re toying with him. that’s just not classy.
it’s not a game. it’s an interaction. a testing. a push and pull. but more importantly, it’s about knowing who you are and placing a high value on yourself. it’s not being a snob. snobs are innately selfish. it’s being comfortable in your own skin and content with just being you.
guys find that super hot.
so feel free to disagree with him, to challenge him, to make him communicate without using sports analogies. feel free to kick his ass at Halo and walk away leaving him drooling in the midst of his humiliation.
just own who you are and expect the same from him.
for the comments:
describe your version of playing hard to get vs. not easy to get.
guys? am i wrong?
girls? think you can do that?
p.s. this works forever. from dating to years of marriage. you never have to stop being not easy to get.