Men’s Health is stupid: Mother’s Day edition

so i did a 2-part series called “according to Men’s Health” here and here.  the conclusion to my break down, Men’s Health is stupid.  here’s another example.

Men’s Health Top 10 Mother’s Day Gifts:

10.  Flowers – “let’s put the most cliche’ gift imaginable on the list, but make it last so it seems like we thought about it.” – Men’s Health writing team.

alternative – flowers are fine for mom, but don’t go cheap and order in advance.  if they are the only thing you are getting for the woman who gave you life, you’d better make it good.  a $10 bouquet from Walmart because you forgot?  unacceptable you ungrateful d-bag.

9.  Candles – cop-out.  both have the same number of letters, start with “c” and suck hard.  if you don’t know enough about your mother to be more creative than candles, i can’t help you.

who am i kidding?  yes i can.

alternative – a bath spa gift basket would do nicely and probably includes a candle if you must give her one.  don’t panic about having to put one together.  any department store, Bath & Body Works type shop or even Target have already done it for you.

8.  Gift Card – just because it says “For You Mom” on it, doesn’t make it right.  this just an upgraded candle cop-out.

alternative – how about you actually take her out to dinner and pay for it?  or take her shopping at whatever store you were going to buy that ill-advised gift card.

7.  Gift Basket – now chill out.  i know i suggested a gift basket like 9 seconds ago.  but the one Men’s Health recommends is full of all the stuff she would need to cook a gourmet meal.  about the only thing a mom wants to make on Mother’s Day is a reservation.

alternative – a gift basket full of her favorite treats.  chocolates and truffles and teas!  oh my!  something she can indulge in without having to dirty all her dishes.

6.  Home Spa Treatment – nothing says “i love you, mom” like a home spa treatment that says “you could look better if you use these products i bought and don’t understand at all”.

alternative – buy her a real spa package where other people do that stuff for her and she gets to lay there and feel amazing and pampered.  duh.

5.  Home Decor – oh em gee.  seriously?  “hey mom!  i love you so much, i bought you a set of decorative towels!”  that’s what Men’s Health links to to make your shopping easier.  someone needs to get punched in the head.

alternative – does your mom collect anything?  buy her something to compliment her collection.  my mom?  porcelain tea cups.  and about a zillion other things.  no collections?  give her a framed pic of you and her.  you’ll be a superhero.

4.  Edible Treats – *insert pic of Edible Bouquets here*  this isn’t so bad, except for the fact that it’s the type of gift she will be required to share and shows an abject lack of personal thought.

alternative – see #7

3.  Greenery – aka “a plant”.  you’d think they would be getting to the good stuff by number 3, right?  apparently not.

alternative – if your mom loves to garden or grow things, this might not be too bad, but you’ll need to be educated about what she likes.  if your only criteria is leaves, pick something else.  if i get a plant for Mother’s Day, somebody gets unborn.

2.  Perfume – 1 question…do you know what kind of perfume your mom wears or likes?  no?  don’t do this.

alternative – can’t think of one.  unless your mom collects perfume or you are absolutely sure of what she’s into, this is just a bad idea all the way around.

1.  Massage and Spa Treatment – ding ding ding.  we have a winner.  would i put it at number 1?  no.  but it does work.  especially if you have to send something to your mom because you live out of town.

word to the wise:

1.  avoid do-it-yourself gifts.  moms want to be catered to on Mother’s Day, not have to work for their pay-off.  (i.e.  gourmet dinner gift basket)

2.  make it personal.  give her a gift that is specific to her likes and tastes.  it shows thought; which for a mom, is a gift all by itself.

3.  spend time.  instead of giving your mom some random gift card, spend time as well as money on her.  this is quite possibly the single most appreciated thing you can do for your mom on Mother’s Day.

your turn.  what are some other good Mother’s Day gifts?

what are some horrible ones?


11 comments on “Men’s Health is stupid: Mother’s Day edition

  1. Yeah…I call my mom on or around Mother’s Day…not that I don’t do so at other times of the year, but I make an effort to put it on that specific day. Same goes for her birthday.

    Don’t judge me, I *am* graduating this semester, so I should have more disposable income in the nearish future, hopefully by next Mother’s Day.

  2. Jenn says:

    Best gift – patio set from Ikea which we assembled. She’d been complaining for years that she wanted one. Oddly she never used it – though my dad loves it. Guess he got his father’s day gift a little early.

    Kitchen Aid mixer though she did use, like and take with her when she moved out.

    I would say she’s your mom – you know that you’ve given her years of hand crafts, so get her something that she actually wants. Or you can consider this time to be a practice run for next years Valentine’s Day – because while you definitely don’t have THAT kind of relationship – she is a woman, and she thinks very similar things to your lovely lady…

  3. Jenn says:

    I would add to the whole taking her out for a meal – cook for her and don’t leave a mess or use the last egg and not tell her. This of course is only if you know how to cook – giving your mom food poisoning is not a good gift.

  4. dinner good. food poisoning bad.

  5. kristinherdy says:

    my mom is getting software she needs for her business, not because I want to get it for her, but because everytime she sees it in the store, she complains about how she needs it but doesn’t want to spend the money on herself.

  6. me says:

    just found your blog, it’s fun. I’m enjoying it. for my mom, I put together pics of the family, pets included (of course) along with videos that she has emailed me over the last year and made an imovie. then loaded it up on youtube for her to see and share. she loves it. happy mother’s day to all the mothers out there…

  7. […] year i tore Men’s Health a new one when it came to their Mother’s Day suggestions.  that terrible publication really needs to […]

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