i have a friend who can’t seem to stop dating the wrong girl. at least not for long. they break up. then they get back together. then they break up. then they get back together….
i know i made that sound like it’s just one girl over and over, and in a way it is. apparently, he has a type. his type is a girl who believes all men are out to get her. to her, men are all are passive aggressive. they do not say what they actually mean, so every word must be interpreted by her to keep her safe from being taken advantage of. men also want to take away her free will and ultimately build a patriarchal society bent on turning all women into shackled chattel wearing Princess Leia costumes (you know the one). okay, they might want that a little bit…but more importantly, i feel an extension to the Glossary of Girls coming on…
and what does he do when she accuses him of something ridiculous that he never intended? he hands over his juevos and apologizes. what’s wrong with apologizing, you say? absolutely nothing. when you actually have something to apologize for.
but if you are groveling to keep the peace or because she has lost her freaking mind because you said, “that’s not my favorite of shirt of yours.” and she responds with, “you oppressive bastard. how dare you try to keep me down by belittling my wardrobe and so hatefully tearing apart my personal choices.”…your manhood is serious jeopardy.
my friend manages to find girls after girl who think all his motives are evil and it is her job to point that out. all. the. time. he’s not to do anything, say anything or even breathe in any fashion she might construe as a slight against her. i’m sure there is some legit neuroses that has made her the way she is, but it doesn’t mean he has to date her.
it also doesn’t mean her behavior towards him should be tolerated or cowed to. good lord, no. it’s not doing her any favors and continually rapes him of all testosterone and the will to stand up and pee. he caves. every time. until he gets fed up and breaks up with her. that is if she doesn’t beat him to it for some trumped up charge of oppression. it would be so much better for her (and that’s a global “her”) if he sat her down and told her that his desire to have a beer with a few guy friends did not mean he was contemplating cheating on her, it only means he’s thirsty. or better yet, tell her to get some serious therapy to help her understand that all men are not innately evil and must therefore be crushed and bent to her will.
it’s a horrible cycle. and i’d love nothing better than to let the air out of its tires.
i know this situation seems extreme and me using hyperbole comes as complete shock to you. it doesn’t? fine. anyhoo…there is a lesson it in for everyone with boy junk.
do not be afraid to defend yourself. if you know you are not in the wrong and you have done nothing hurtful, yet are being blamed for it anyway, it’s time to say something. if you are being used, it’s time to put your size 10 down on the neck of emasculation. pull a Nancy Regan and just say no.
men today are told they must always be on the receiving of whatever a woman dishes out, that they are clearly the stupid one in the relationship. have you seen a family TV sitcom lately where the father is smart and bold? no. you haven’t. the days of Bill Cosby and Howard Cunningham are all but over. but that’s LaLa land. this is real life and men sure as shootin’ should still be men.
now before i start getting hate mail from the NOW gang, i’m not saying men should go back to treating women as property and taking away the vote.
not even a little bit.
i am saying men need to be men and not allow women to turn them into kicking puppies or whipping boys. there is no joy in unequal relationships. mutual respect is a requirement. if the girl you are dating is quick to assume you have evil motives and acts accordingly before even asking you what you intended, you’ve got problems.
find your spine and speak up.
be a freaking man.
i don’t even know what questions to ask for comment fodder. i feel like i’ve been ranting for the last 6 minutes.
how was your weekend?
anybody oppress you lately?