so you know what day it is. monday. specifically the second monday of february.
a very pink, heart and flower riddled, Cupid arrow in the nether regions, restaurant reservation Fight Club, He Went to Jared monday.
probably the biggest monday of 2011 to go on an overpriced date. go figure.
there is some romantic value though. in my never humble opinion, dating gets a bad rap. or wrap. it just depends on whether you’re single or a dude trying his hand at gift paper. either way, there is a part of dating that is always happy making. maybe even the entire reason for dating…
oh man, i do love the flutters. that “this person seems to be really into me and i’m thoroughly enjoying myself” feeling. does that feeling happen every time or last forever? no to former, possibly to the latter…if you do it right.
a huge mistake couples make when they finally settle on the one they exchange “til’ death do us part” with, is to stop dating. now before you join a swingers club, because that would clearly be the conclusion to draw from my last sentence and knowing i wield a god-like influence over your good judgment, hear me out.
just because you’re in a committed relationship, doesn’t mean that you get to stop wooing your chosen hottie.
the purpose of dating is to get to know the person you’re with. this doesn’t change when you get all gussied up and sign some legal papers. the person you choose for life, is going to change. how boring would it be if they didn’t? and surprise! you’re going to change too.
dating helps you keep up with the new stuff. it gives you an opportunity to talk, to flirt, to hang out and remember why you’re together in the first place.
how to never stop dating:
1. get all tarted up – go out of your way to look good. girls, get your hair did. guys, do something other than throw a flannel over the t-shirt you’ve been wearing since yesterday. making an effort makes the other person feel like you haven’t stopped trying. that you still want to be attractive to them, to give them whiplash when you walk in a room.
2. plan it – schedules can get crazy. make sure there’s a time set aside just to date. date nights are great. keep them sacred. again, it shows the other person their importance to you. that you are willing to be protective of your time with them. this doesn’t mean it has to be every tuesday (or monday), but just a commitment to time.
3. be spontaneous – this doesn’t conflict with or replace number 2. doing something fun, romantic or thoughtful just because it would be awesome, keeps things fresh and frankly, hot. Craig bought me a pair of rubber boots as old as i am a couple of months ago and they’re so cool! just a thing he picked up at thrift store because they made him think of me. no special event, not my birthday, no anything that would cause expectation. it was better than any of that because it was an opportunity that presented itself and was capitalized on.
4. flirt – keep doing all those things that lets them know you are into them and want them to be into you. tease, joke, touch….flirt!
dating is fun! it’s the one thing that continually strikes a spark. my parents just celebrated 50 years of marriage and still go out on dates. sometimes my dad will even send my mom to buy herself something fabulous to wear as an excuse to take her out. it’s freaking adorable.
it is really hard to take a relationship for granted when you are continually putting effort in to please the one you’re with. going out on dates and always keeping a part of your mind open to watch for things that the other person would like is key to the longevity of any relationship. and don’t confuse that with constantly having to work for approval. that’s a completely different thing. dating the person you love is about caring and maintaining the joy you found before the commitment was made. aka, the flutters.
long story short…
never ever stop dating.
here’s what i posted on Craig’s facebook wall today:
what are you doing on this particular monday?