girls have this weird thing they believe. “just one”, you say? no, but this particular thing is more or less unique to females and has 93% of all men convinced that russian roulette is more fun and less dangerous. 93% is a scientific fact, not a number i made up. i’m pretty sure.
girls think guys should/can/will read their minds. for whatever reason the fairer sex is convinced that every guy they date is/should be/better be psychic. which is neither fair nor sexy.
having the correct plumbing does not make me an expert on why they do this. but since “beats the hell out of me” isn’t the answer you’re looking for, i’ll take a stab at it.
1. “he knows what he did” – news flash, chica. no he doesn’t. you’re in trouble with your girl, this you know. toe tapping, folded arms, lack of eye contact, excessive use of the word “fine”. the signs are clear. what can often be a mystery is why she’s so put out.
2. “he should know what i want” – uh huh. yeah. how is he suppose to know that? this usually applies to gifts. for some guys, this one is easier than others. but that all depends on your varying degrees of obliviousness. however, no matter how right you think you might get it, asking her what she wants could result in tears and fury.
3. “nothing” – you know something’s wrong. she’s making it clear there’s something wrong. but when you ask her, she says, “nothing”. that word should come with an “unstable explosives” warning label. “nothing” always means something. what “something” means is anybody’s guess.
4. “i shouldn’t have to ask” – this is a field of land-mines. it could be referring to anything from the sink needs fixing to noticing the 3 millimeters she had cut off her hair to the desire for you to compliment her new pair of True Religions that absolutely do not make her butt look big.
i’m sure there are so many more, but in reality, they all boil down to the same thing. “he should just know!” why do they think this? here’s my best guess:
they think that you should be devotedly observant and concentrating so hard on their every clue and nuance that you develop some super secret love power that enables you to understand their every whim and thought.
oh yes. it’s crazy. no doubt about it.
there’s really only one solution to this madness.
you’re going to have to ask her.
and you are going to have stand your ground in getting an answer.
let her know that you really want to help/get it right/understand what you did…whatever…but that she’s going to have to communicate with you. being self-deprecating wouldn’t hurt either. a little “have some pity on me, i’m just a guy” could go a long way.
the only time you should let it go, is on the “nothing” thing. all you need to find out is if it has anything to do with you. if it does, make her talk. if it doesn’t and she just wants to be inside her own head for a while, let her. she’ll talk if she needs to. god knows…
you, my friend, are not James Van Praagh. do not feel guilty for getting it wrong if she won’t tell you how to get it right.
and girls, every time you think to yourself, “he should just know!”, you will hear my e-voice inside your head saying, “uh yeah…no he shouldn’t.”